Hey Dude!! I am rude !!

It was a pleasant Friday morning. We were driving towards Wyanad for a holiday. Mood in the car was jovial. It has been some time we have gone for a vacation and here we are going for a vacation. We were nearing Mysore and there you go, everything turned upside down. There was a speed breaker on the road. I decelerated the car and then I had to helplessly watch the rear view mirror to see the car behind me forcefully colliding my car. Impact was so high that my car collided the rear of the car which was in front of my car. Cheer turned to rage!!! Then I see a middle aged man jumping out of the car and I shouted at him “Andha hai kya, Are you blind. This is ridiculous”. As I told this, I glanced on the rear of my car and figured the damage was pretty high. Mr.X who caused the damage walked towards me and apologized. He had worn a T-shirt and half pants and felt as if he woke up and directly walked into the car. Something had badly spilled over his T-shirt and later on I figured out that his wife was feeding Gulab Jamun and in that romantic moment he lost sight of the road and the rest is history. Oh, God!!!! Then driver of the car in front of mine came and started literally shouting at Mr.X in top of his voice. Mr.X started sweating and for a small dent on the bumper Mr.X was asked to pay Rs.8000, which he paid and settled. Mr.X’s car broke down, but my car fortunately was in a working condition. As if a favour done to humanity Mr.X told “Good there is no human casualty”. I kept my cool, even though inside I was boiling with rage. Here is the reckless guy who has turned my holiday into a horrible day. Then he calls up his friends in Mysore. We go together to police station. I see Mr.X’s friends chatting with police in Kannada. We explain to police the incident. Police register a case and gives case note which is written in Kannada to me for insurance claim. Since I did not know Kannada and I asked Mr.X’s friends to read the case note. They told everything is fine. Later on when the events unfolded, I figured out being a cultured human always works as a disadvantage. After I am back in Bangalore, I go to the insurance company and submit my claim and attached the police case note with the claim form. I explain to the insurance officer about the incident. After I reach back my office, I get a call from insurance company officer. He tells that police case note says that I had taken my family to a temple and when I reversed the car it collided a tree causing the damage. This is what is called being rude!!!! I called up Mr.X and he acted as if he had no clue about anything. That is worse than being rude…… Anyways, I somehow fixed the issue and got the claim approved. If I had been rude to Mr.X like the car driver who shouted and took Rs.8000 for the damage, probably Mr.X would not have taken me for a ride. Yes my friend, being rude is the way to do. Tell “Hey Dude, I am rude!!!!”, that is what the world wants……

Rudeness is an attribute which I see these days people are possessing with a sense of pride as part of their persona. You can see it in their body language, the way they converse, the way they express themselves, etc. In fact, we do not possess this attribute inherently, but people train themselves to be rude. Logically, progress in collective intellect of our species should lead to refinement in our behaviour. Whereas, what I see is the opposite. It seems to be an oxymoron. So what is wrong? Erosion of values. It is high time we realize this and take corrective action.

I see rudeness in all walks of life. Look at the advertisements these days. Whether it is required or not we will see a woman with fine contours giving you a rude look. Oh Sorry!! Which world am I in, rudeness is beauty these days. Yes, some time I feel like an alien in my own planet. Have you observed chat language of youngsters. Oh boy, it is rude!!! 

It was a weekend and after my afternoon nap, I was lazing on the sofa with a cup of tea. Calling bell rang and I opened the door. My son’s friend who stays in the campus was at the door. “Hello, Manoj. How are you?” I asked. He acted as if he did not hear that and with a sense of urgency he asked “Uncle, can I get Sidu’s football?”. I replied “Why not?”. I called up my son “Sidu, Manoj has come. Go and play with him”. My son came running and then Manoj says, “Sidu, I did not say I want to play with you. I just want your football”. I wondered, what is that? Yet again a small child is saying “Hey, Dude. I am rude”….. 

We complain about today’s youngsters being rude, but mistake is committed by us. In the rat race of amassing material possessions we fail to spend valuable time with our young ones to inculcate a good value system.

This incident happened in one of the organizations that I used to work. It was hectic time at work; meanwhile a worldwide contest was announced in the organization, for employees to develop a software solution using a suite of products. Myself and two of my colleagues signed up as a team for the contest. Two colleagues did some lip service around that, but all the work was done by me. I had to stretch myself over the weekends and after office hours. We won the contest and without any doubt other two proposed that we should split the prize money equally. I know all of you will have a similar story to say. But story is not over yet. After a week myself, one of the colleagues who was there in the contest team and three others were having lunch and topic of discussion was the contest. Then I made a statement that all work was done by me and I found the other colleague was offended. He called me aside and started aggressing. Hey Dude, I am rude!!!

Often rudeness originates from aggression. Today’s so called corporate philosophy has elements of aggression in it either explicitly or implicitly. This has repercussions on society. But corporates are part of the same society and hence corporate philosophy has origins from the same society.

We had just moved to our new house which I had bought in Whitefield (Bangalore). I was discussing about the house and neighbouring locality to some of my friends in a get-together, and, here walks in one of my friends. He is very particular he has to pass a comment. He makes a remark “Vinod, what a place yaar? Why did you buy there? So far from city and not a place good to settle down”.  Why should somebody speak that way? Anybody knows what it means to buy a house and how much effort goes into it. It is nothing but rudeness. Hey Dude, I am rude……

Rudeness does not go hand in hand with humility and empathy, two important characteristics of a healthy society. I see people walking around with a ton of ego and it manifests as rudeness. People are immersed in oneself and are insensitive to others and hence devoid of empathy.

Indian ethos has taught us to be humble. Why were we taught to prostrate in front of Guru. It is an expression of respect and humility. These days I see several youngsters hesitating because they feel it affects their self-esteem. People try to differentiate from others by enacted sophistication. It looks ridiculous!! Simplicity reduces desire, and that leads to contentment. One who is self-aware and contented cannot be rude.